Review: Esther: Royal Beauty

Esther (A Dangerous Beauty Novel Book #1): Royal Beauty by Angela Elwell Hunt

My rating: 1 of 5 stars

 This novel shouldn't be called “Esther.” It should be called “Eunuch, Royal Eunuchs: a Dangerous Castration Novel.”

 I got this book through the Blogger Review Program with Bethany House, and I chose it because I thought it might be a good retelling of the story of Esther. I love the Bible's account of Esther. I love her story of internal struggle, trying to live up to the expectations of her people. It is a story of fear and triumph.

 This novel slaughtered the original story. But I'm willing to give it some benefit of a doubt. I tend to read like a writer, which can be a double-edged sword for me and the stories I read. However, the cons outweighed the pros so much that this novel got hung on the gallows of bad storytelling.

 Readers, prepare yourselves for my brutal honesty as a reader and author.
Pros - This novel is kinda like reading a history book with a terrible focus. There's lots of background on the time and place presented in this book, and while I feel Hunt overdid the history lessons, at least she knew what she was talking about.

 I liked the two main character-dynamic storytelling/format with Esther and Harbonah, even though that's pretty much the only good storytelling part of the book. We got into the heads of these characters and knew their thoughts and feelings towards what was going on. The story flowed pretty well towards the climax, and I stopped reading shortly after.

 Cons - Now for my royal beef about “Esther.”

 Focus -- My biggest problem with this novel was its focus: Esther having sex with Xerxes. Let me break it down. If Hunt had wanted to be true to the Biblical account, she would have gone over this point fairly quick. The Bible gets this done and over with within the first few chapters, and then turns its focus to Haman and his scheme against the Jews, and how Esther has to use her new position as queen to save her people.

 Not happening. This is a romance novel, Sarah. There has to be sex. Who cares about Esther's struggle between her beliefs and her secular position? Who cares about what happens to the Jews? About 65% of this novel is historical drudgery of Xerxes marching against the Greeks, royal and eunuch angst, Esther growing up, and Harbonah observing the goings-on, which all leads up to the presumable climax of Esther hopping into bed (with next to no hesitation) with Xerxes. And she smiles about it.

 Blaaarrggh.

 I shall now turn my attention to the characters to help explain why the book has this terrible focus. 

Characters -- This book did no justice to the Esther I know. The story starts out with Hadassah as a young girl just leaving her tween years. She lives in Susa with her Persian friend Parasitys (sp?), as well as her cousin-parents Mordecai and Miriam. Hadassah has this weird patriotism towards the pagan nation the Jews live in, and she dreams of living in the palace and basically sleeping with Xerxes, a pagan man decades her senior.

 Really? A Jewish girl, raised in the Law of Moses by her awesome and pious cousins, dreams of having sex with a pagan king? I'm not buying it. I got a huge vibe throughout the hunk of book I finished that Esther cared very little for her religion, even into adulthood, and almost seemed glad to be brought to the palace for a chance to sleep with Xerxes. And when she does end up in bed with him, she feels no guilt, and seems pleased she was able to commit fornication despite everything she knows about God's commandments.

 Instead of heeding Mordecai's teachings, she listens more to the advice of one of the head concubines, which was essentially this: if you sleep with a man more than once, that means he loves you and that you need to protect him. I'm sorry, am I reading the Twilight Saga or something?

 Now to Harbonah. Harbonah is one of several eunuchs that live in the palace at Susa, and he personally serves Xerxes. He travels with him and everything. He has a love of service for the king,which is cool. However, he angsts several times throughout the book over the fact that he is castrated.

 Here's kinda my thought process about this character: First I read he's a eunuch. Okay, I know what eunuchs are: they're castrated so they don't sleep around with any of the women. Then Harbonah points out he's castrated. Yes, I know you're castrated. I'm a big girl, I know what a eunuch is. Then he does it again and again, and the author never reveals his whole background of castration until later, and before that point I'm thinking, “Stop already, I know what castration is!”

 Harbonah was much an observer, and he formed a friendship with Esther due to his friendship with Mordecai. Much of this character's focus was around his castration and Xerxes. That's about it.

 Oh Xerxes. The author presents him as a terrible man. He marches his massive army hundreds of miles to beat up the Greeks, shows tendancies of insanity when he orders his men to beat up the ocean, and likes to sleep around with his many concubines. So how is the reader supposed to hoorah about his relationship with Esther? Why, bring Esther down to his level, of course! Which is exactly what this novel did.

 The only character I liked was Mordecai. He was the only character who saw through all the evil going on and, frankly, seemed like the only character who had any brains. He tries to counsel Hadassah and warn her about the dangers of the palace while she derps around with the other prospective wives. He's hard-working, studious, and knows how not to be an idiot. I wish there had been more focus on him, because that would have helped the author focus on what Esther's story should really be about: the preservation of the Jewish people in Persia.

 Story – Like other novels I have read, this story suffers from good-writing-but-bad-storytelling syndrome. Hunt has a great talent for writing. She does well with story flow, sentences, and grammar, but she has written a terrible story in “Esther.” The story is about Esther having sex with Xerxes, and secondly about eunuchs. I didn't finish the novel, but considering the short chunk devoted to the rest of Esther's real story, I don't have any high expectations for satisfaction.

 Speaking of eunuchs, that was another story focus that really bugged me. I've already touched on Harbonah, but I have yet more horrors to reveal. Throughout the novel there was this strange fascination about the eunuchs: their castration, of course, but the author also took the time to detail their curves (which I really didn't need to know about), and even describes Harbonah as feminine. Gag me.

 One of the problems with obsessing over the characteristics of the eunuchs is that it contributed nothing to the story. Hunt points out that the eunuchs are key to communicating with the king or something for some strange reason, but beyond that, there's no need to describe their soft hips or stomachs or glossy girly hair.

 The story of Esther becoming queen suffers from bad focus and bad characters, and I had no catharsis from the story.

 Conclusion - Never before have I woken up at the witching hours so angry at a book. I hadn't even been thinking about it much the previous day. I tried to trudge through this novel, I tried to give it a chance, but I simply couldn't finish it. I was tempted to throw this book at a wall if it disappointed me any further, and it's made me want to headdesk, chop it up with one of my machetes, and burn it. It's a terrible book, and I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. In fact, this book has turned me off from reading ANY scriptural retellings. If you want to read about Esther, pull out your Bible. It's loads more satisfying.

 My Goodreads one-star rating doesn't just mean I don't like it. I hated this book.

 I received a free book from Bethany House in exchange for an honest review.